Author: Mel WAGENAAR
Educational Psychologist, Teacher and Mother, South Africa
Getting your child accepted to study at a desired school or institution can be a stressful process. As an educational psychologist in practice who sees many anxious families, all trying to do the “best” for their child, this is a very relevant topic for discussion.
Starting formal schooling marks a significant milestone in a child’s life, bringing both excitement and anxiety for families. In Hong Kong, this transition is particularly noteworthy due to the unique pressures of the education system. Understanding and managing stress during this period is crucial for fostering a positive experience for both parents and children.
Parents in Hong Kong face numerous stressors as their children begin school. Academic expectations can be overwhelming, with many schools emphasizing high performance from an early age. There is also concern about social integration, as children navigate new friendships and social dynamics. Additionally, balancing work and family life adds another layer of complexity, often leaving parents feeling stretched thin.
The competitive educational environment in Hong Kong amplifies these stressors. Societal and familial expectations can increase pressure, as many parents feel compelled to ensure their child’s success in a rigorous academic setting. This cultural backdrop can make the transition to school more daunting. Then there is the added pressure of the formal entrance interview …
Participating in school interviews can be a daunting process for both parents and children in Hong Kong. It’s important to approach these interviews with a calm and supportive mindset. Preparing your child by practising typical questions in a relaxed setting can help build their confidence and communication skills. Emphasize the importance of being themselves, rather than rehearsing scripted answers. Additionally, remind your child that these interviews are just one part of the selection process and not a reflection of their worth. As a parent, maintaining a positive and encouraging attitude can alleviate pressure, helping your child feel more at ease during the experience.
Here are some common interview questions children might face during school selection:
- Can you tell us about yourself?
- What are your favourite activities or hobbies?
- Tell us about your favourite book?
- Who do you play with at home or in the park?
- Can you describe your family?
- What do you enjoy doing at school?
- Why do you want to come to this school?
- Can you count to ten or recite the alphabet?
- What is your favourite thing to learn about?
- How do you feel about starting school?
These questions aim to assess a child’s communication skills, interests, and readiness for school. Helping your child prepare for school interviews can be a positive experience. Here are some tips:
Practice Through Play: Use role-play to simulate interview scenarios. Make it fun and engaging to reduce anxiety.
Encourage Natural Responses: Teach your child to answer honestly and naturally rather than memorizing responses.
Boost Confidence: Praise your child’s efforts and reassure them that it’s okay to make mistakes.
Discuss Interests: Talk about their favourite activities, books, and hobbies to help them articulate their thoughts.
Foster Communication Skills: Encourage daily conversations to improve their ability to express themselves clearly.
Stay Relaxed: Maintain a calm environment before the interview to help your child feel at ease.
Visit the School: Familiarize your child with the school setting if possible, making it feel more familiar and less intimidating.
There are many storybooks that can help children prepare for school interviews and transitions. Here are some titles easily available in the Hong Kong Public Library system:
- “Wemberly Worried” by Kevin Henkes is a comforting story about dealing with anxiety in new situations.
- “Llama Llama Misses Mama” by Anna Dewdney helps children understand separation and starting school.
- “The Kissing Hand” by Audrey Penn offers reassurance for children facing new experiences.
- “First Day Jitters” by Julie Danneberg is a fun story that addresses first-day nerves and surprises.
- “Chrysanthemum” by Kevin Henkes encourages self-acceptance and confidence in new environments.
To read stories in a relaxed and engaging way, find a cozy, quiet spot where you and your child can sit together without distractions. Establish a regular reading time to create a comforting routine. Use expressive voices to bring characters to life, making the story more engaging. Pause occasionally to discuss the story, asking open-ended questions to encourage interaction. Follow your child’s lead if they want to linger on a page or ask questions, ensuring it remains enjoyable. Start with shorter sessions and gradually increase the time as both of you become more comfortable. These approaches can help make reading a fun and stress-free activity for you and your child.
Stress can significantly affect the parent-child relationship. Communication may become strained as parents project their anxieties onto their children, inadvertently increasing the child’s own stress levels. This can create a cycle of anxiety that impacts the entire family dynamic. Parental stress not only affects emotional health but can also manifest physically. Sleepless nights, headaches, and a constant sense of worry are common among stressed parents. This can lead to burnout, making it difficult to provide the support and care children need during this transition. Building a support network can alleviate stress. Engaging with parent support groups allows for the sharing of experiences and advice. Additionally, utilizing community resources, such as workshops and counselling services, can provide valuable guidance and support.
Reflecting on the journey of starting school, it’s important for parents to celebrate small successes and maintain a long-term perspective on education. By managing stress and supporting their children, parents can help ensure a positive start to formal schooling.
